The Horror Honeys: Witch Month ~ Top 5 Bad Witches in Television

Witch Month ~ Top 5 Bad Witches in Television

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A Horror TV Honey Top 5 List by Jennica

“Only bad witches are ugly.” 

The very first witch film that I ever saw was The Wizard of Oz (1939) at the age of five and I instantly became obsessed. While I was enamored by the beauty and—for a moment—the superficial kindness of Glinda the Good Witch, but the Wicked Witch of the West was someone with whom I could relate. She was a born leader but greatly misunderstood. But, beyond that, she made being bad look like so much more fun. Glinda might be able to transport people and objects from one place to another and fly around in a pink bubble, but the Wicked Witch of the West had an entire evil empire complete with soldiers and flying monkeys… and I want a flying monkey. 

Once the flame to my fascination with witches was lit, I began to look to other sources of witchy goodness. Still drawn to the more sinister side of the broomstick, I found a wide array of wicked women in television. From classic television shows depicting a more innocent and playful kind of sorcery to modern day televised bloody sacrifices, bad never looked so good. 

Without further ado, here are my Top 5 Bad Witches in Television!

1) Fiona Good – American Horror Story: Coven

Jessica Lange has proven over the last few years that she can turn being evil into an art form. Whether she is taking on the role of a naughty nun or a sadistic freak show leader, we just cannot be mad at her. But as Fiona Goode, a witch who is both a nurturer as well as a destroyer, she adds a strong sense of class and timelessness to that old black magic. Her intentions are sometimes in the right place (but are mostly completely selfish), but when she lets her magic do the talking, Hell hath no fury. She is seductive, insanely paranoid, and more than a little crabby... but she protects her own.

Feels. 

2) Marnie Stonebrook – True Blood

I am the great cornholio!
Bon Temp’s local Wiccan magic shop owner Marnie Stonebrook is one bad witch, however, it is difficult not to sympathize with her at first. Marnie appears fidgety and socially awkward, longing to be accepted by small town society but fighting against the status quo at the same time. But Marnie’s endearing qualities quickly wear thin when she displays a side of herself that is just as ignorant as those who have cast her out. With a giant chip on her shoulder, Marnie is spellbound on getting revenge against vampires for tormenting witches centuries ago. Normally when channeling the spirit world, the living are possessed by the dead, but Marnie makes it very clear that she is the one pulling the strings.


3) Willow Rosenberg – Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Look what I can do!
Although Willow spends most of the television series as a good witch and Buffy Summers' sidekick, she has battled her share of inner—and outer—demons, and we love it. College is a strange time. You have survived high school and its endless judgments from greasy-haired acne-prone peers. Just when you think you are in the clear, college turns out to be not so different from your adolescent prison. Like many college students, Willow at first struggles to find her people on campus and a place to belong. Unfortunately, when she does find a group of campus witches, she discovers that most of them have simply seen The Craft one too many times. So she proceeds to practice solo and learns that she has quite a talent. In fact, she has so much power that it becomes addictive and she transforms into a magic junkie. Why come clean with your friends when you could just wipe away their memories and start fresh?

4) Endora – Bewitched

There are plenty of men and women in the world who despise their in-laws and there have been a number of movies depicting psychotic mother-in-laws in particular. But Bewitched turned the annoyance of the mother-in-law species into an entire television series. While there are certainly more hateful mother-in-law characters in film and real life compared to Endora, most of them do not have the power of magic on their side. Endora is snide, determined, and has an endless sense of creativity to make her daughter’s husband’s life a living Hell. Darrin Stephens deserves a medal… although he might have had some of the trickery coming to him as punishment for his tiny 1960s mind.
Her other power is tacky fashion sense. 
5) Sabrina Spellman – Sabrina the Teenage Witch


But I am so nice.
I know what you may be thinking. Sabrina the Teenage Witch was a show for the barely pubescent and Sabrina Spellman was just a normal high school kid with the exception of practicing magic as extracurricular. However, raging hormones, high school feudalism, and the ability to do what you want when you want (as long as your aunties do not catch you, of course) make one toxic mixture of bad. While she appears to make attempts to help her friends and ruin the lives of her foes, let’s face it, there is nothing remotely pure or altruistic about the intent of a teenager. Relax, Sabrina. High school will be over in four years. Learn to survive like the rest of us.

Who is YOUR favorite badass TV witch?