The Horror Honeys: Deadpool: Multi-Faceted Lady Boner Activate!

Deadpool: Multi-Faceted Lady Boner Activate!

A Revenge Honey "Oh my cock" Review with Linnie

Deadpool (2016)

As a Marvel girl from way back, one of the characters I never imagined making his way to the big screen was Wade Wilson, aka Deadpool. In 2004, Dead described himself as a cross between Ryan Reynolds and a shar pei, so really... how the hell are you going to make that work?

Oh, okay. Hire Ryan Reynolds to play Deadpool? Yeah, that could work. As long as you don't puss out and give it a "family-friendly" PG-13 rating.

Oh, okay. It's rated-R? A HARD R? And they're keeping his fourth-wall-breaking jackass attitude?

GIVE ME THE MOVIE NOW!

This has been my general attitude since the disaster that was X-Men Origins: Wolverine and the squandering of Reynolds as Wade Wilson in that film. Along with the excitement that Mr. Pool was finally getting a standalone, came trepidation that the studio would fuck it up again. Reynolds may have been a seasoned smart-ass, but director Tim Miller had never done anything but shorts, and the writers only had Zombieland and G.I. Joe: Retaliation to their names. So could Deadpool survive all of this?

The answer is yes. Yes it could. Can I see it again now? Will someone go with me... right now?

Must protect our most precious Canadians!
The Story (Just in the movie... if you want his full backstory, you have decades of comics to catch up on): Wade Wilson (Reynolds) is a mercenary with a military background, who uses his skills to help underdogs in shitty situations. He's a smartass, but in a way you can't help but love, which is how his longtime girlfriend Vanessa (Morena Baccarin) feels about him. So when Wade is diagnosed with multi-organ, end-stage cancer, he does whatever he can to stay with her, which includes undergoing extreme experiments at the hands of Ajax (Ed Skrein) and Angel (Gina Carano) that leave him horribly disfigured but with super powers. So our ultimate anti-hero goes on a mission of revenge, intent on murdering the shit out of Ajax, but also finding his way back to Vanessa.

Deadpool a love story. But it's also a revenge story. And a straight-up horror movie. In other words, Deadpool is everything.

I'd do both. Either. Or. Plop me down right in the middle. #noshame
Unlike most comic book films (from Marvel OR DC), Deadpool was made for fans of the comic. Not for kids, and not for the summer movie-going, blockbuster loving popcorn-munchers. It's rare that, as a fan of a series, you can walk into a movie and know it was made with you in mind. No punches were pulled in trying to water down the dialogue, and none of Wade's harder edges were dulled to try and appease censors. This means Deadpool is a rollicking, hilarious, bloody, filthy comic movie for actual grownups who don't always want to suffer through Zack Snyder's latest attempt at slow-mo brooding.

Slow-mo... yes. Brooding? Not a lick.
If you've never read a Deadpool title, or you tend toward the CBS sitcom brand of comedy, this probably isn't going to be a movie that makes a lot of sense to you. But as a con-going, Wade-loving, sarcasm-fluent comic book reader of twenty-five years who counts Deadpool among her favorites, this movie was everything I could have hoped for. And more. So so much more.

Now, let's make that sequel with Cable a reality, bitches!


Revenge Honey Rating: 5 raging lady boners out of 5

Deadpool is in theaters now. GO!

In lieu of a trailer... let's just all shoop.