The Horror Honeys: 'The Last Seduction': She Wants It All. And She Wants It Now.

'The Last Seduction': She Wants It All. And She Wants It Now.

A Revenge Honey Erotic Thriller November Review with Linnie

The Last Seduction (1994) ~ Bill Pullman Double Feature Part Two!

Oh Bill Pullman, you sassy bastard, what COULDN'T you do? You went from playing the good guy in Malice to playing the vaguely skeezy guy in John Dahl's The Last Seduction, with a sex comedy co-starring Brad Pitt (The Favor) in between. But for those who haven't seen The Last Seduction, there will be no mincing words: this is Linda Fiorentino's fucking movie and if you even try to imply anything else I may cut you. Because in The Last Seduction, Fiorentino plays one of the few true femme fatales we had the pleasure of seeing on the screen in the 80s and 90s...

In that she was a stone cold, manipulative, calculating, sexy ass bitch. And I mean all of that as a compliment.

~ I’m just trying to decide if you’re a total bitch or not.
~ I’m a total fucking bitch!

She's vetting him for junk diseases. Heh.
The Story: Bridget (Fiorentino) is a telemarketer married to a med student named Clay (Pullman), whom she has just convinced to sell $700,000 worth of pharmaceutical grade cocaine to a bunch of loan sharks. Once Clay has the money, Bridget takes it and runs to Chicago, stopping in a nowhere town in upstate New York on her way. There, she meets small-town insurance agent Mike (Peter Berg), a dude who has just gotten married on a whim but seems pretty bummed about it. What follows is a series of brilliantly planned con games, manipulation, and some damn fine sex scenes in which Fiorentino shows off what a gorgeous babe she was, despite the fact she never really got any credit for it.

She's here, she's fierce, and she doesn't remotely need any of your bullshit.
One of the things I love most about The Last Seduction is that on the surface, not one character in this movie is remotely likable. Since I'm going to avoid spoilers on this one, and to explain further is to spoil what is a masterfully intricate screenplay, let's just say that Bridget, Mike, and Clay are all fairly awful in their own ways. Bridget takes the femme fatale to its most logical conclusion, in which a woman has become so smart, and so independent, that she renders every man in her life useless. This would be awesome, if she hadn't done so by being just a wee bit of a sociopath. Mike is a whiney, clingy brat, who Bridget is only using for the sex, and I can't say I blame her. Clay kicks off the movie by slapping Bridget, so fuck that guy. Overall, these characters are the worst, and yet you find yourself totally enamored of them.

You guys suck. But I love you anyway.
The style, the music, and the dialogue of The Last Seduction remind me of The Big Sleep, another noir with a screenplay that practically oozes sex even in the tamest scenes. But the benefit of the fifty year age difference between the films is that The Last Seduction gets to act out what Bogey and Bacall could only hint at on screen. And we are the luckier for it. Not every film needs sex, but damn if The Last Seduction doesn't know how to milk every ounce of Linda Fiorentino's Bacall-esque power and style.

Pullman isn't so bad either.
Bummer Erotic Thriller Fact: There was talk about Linda Fiorentino getting an Oscar nomination for her role in The Last Seduction, but because the film aired once on HBO before its release in theaters, the Academy deemed her ineligible (this is no longer a rule because Netflix). The film's producers even sued the Academy to try and get them to reverse to the decision, to no avail. However, Fiorentino went on to win Best Actress awards from the Society of Texas Film Critics Awards, the New York Film Critics Circle Awards, the Indie Spirits, the London Film Critics Circle Awards, and was nominated for a BAFTA (the British version of the Oscars). So...

Throughout Erotic Thriller month, we are going to be working on a far more stringent rating scale than usual. That means that if I REALLY like a film, it will probably get a three star rating. If I love a film, four stars. If I want to take a movie behind the middle school and get it pregnant, that's a five star rating right there. So with that in mind, The Last Seduction gets:

Erotic Thriller Rating: 5 dropped panties out of 5

The Last Seduction is available via YouTube & DVD

Do YOU love Linda Fiorentino like I do?
Tell me on Twitter: @linnieloowho