The Horror Honeys: Honey Buzz ~ Paranormal Activity will haunt us forever.... awesome.

Honey Buzz ~ Paranormal Activity will haunt us forever.... awesome.

Please read this news in the most unexcited monotone you can imagine.

As if we haven't had enough of this Paranormal Activity idiocy. Lo and behold, now we will never be free. I don't even know if I can muster the strength to do anything but scatter gifs throughout the original post, so unless it's a snide comment in parentheses, this is straight from Variety's article.

According to Variety, in May 2016, "horror fans" (I put this in quotes because I don't think the people who write/make these things know who we are) will be able to gain a whole new perspective on the horror series with a video game that will give them the illusion of being amongst the haunted, thanks to virtual reality(VR) technology.

The still-unnamed virtual reality video game is being developed by Beast Media Group, which licensed the rights for the franchise from Paramount Studios. The game won’t be based on any of the existing six movies (obviously, because why the fuck would they do that?); instead a whole new storyline, to play out in virtual reality, will be developed for it, said Beast Media’s co-managing partner Alex Barder during a recent interview. “VR is the next chapter of the franchise,” he said.

The company plans to debut the “Paranormal Activity” game on all major VR platforms, including Oculus, Vive and Morpheus. It will also develop a non-VR version for more traditional gamers, and eventually aims to bring a more lightweight experience to mobile VR platforms like Gear VR as well. (oh good, so the plebs can play it too. How nice.) 

And as scary as possible, one might add. That even includes the sound design: Beast Media has been getting some help from the sound designers at Universal Sound to craft soundscapes that both help players navigate the VR space and make the look in the right direction, but also throw them off if necessary. “We definitely will be guiding the gamer with carefully placed sounds,” said sound supervisor Kelly Oxford. “We want to draw the player into a false sense of safety and then hit them hard with big sounds and visuals.” (THEY'RE PUTTING JUMP SCARES IN YOUR GAMES. ARE WE DONE WITH THIS YET?!? They've spoon fed you this entire series of movies, and now they're going to spoon feed you a fucking game. When will the madness end???)

Naftal and Barder founded Beast Media earlier this year as a multiplatform company, with VR being a key piece of the puzzle. The duo said that a project like the “Paranormal Activity” VR game seemed like a great project to tackle early on, in part because monetization isn’t an issue with video gamers. “There is an existing install base who is used to paying for content,” Barder said. (Translation: they already know you're going to pay for it, sucker, so get ready!)

A first preview of the “Paranormal Activity” game, which as you can see from the article above has nothing whatsoever to do with the film series except for the name and the vague concept of being followed by pissy ghosts is being prepared for Gamescon in Cologne, Germany, early next month - so there will likely be a gameplay trailer or some kind of teaser that will make me want to throw things at walls. Sweet.

(Source: Variety)