The Horror Honeys: Wicked, tricksy, false! Only not all that wicked…

Wicked, tricksy, false! Only not all that wicked…

A Supernatural Honey Rage Baby Review by Suzanne

Devil’s Backbone, Texas (2015)

Occasionally, when I’m sick or really hating myself, I randomly select things on Netflix I’m pretty sure are gonna suck, but I watch them anyway, only to feel much worse afterward. This is one of those times. I once proclaimed I would never watch another film with the word “Devil” in the title. I can’t even keep promises to myself.

I love a good documentary and when I began watching Devil’s Backbone, Texas, I thought that’s what I was getting into because I went in completely blind. Do you remember the show Unsolved Mysteries, hosted by Robert Stack? Well, back in 1996 they profiled a man named Bert Wall, an historical writer who lived in the Devil’s Backbone and claimed to encounter a myriad of spirits. Years later, after Wall passed away, his son Jake Wall, also a writer, decides to dig into the mysterious circumstances surrounding his death.

Jake brings along some childhood friends to his father’s ranch in the Backbone for support as he scatters his father’s ashes and brings closure to the dysfunctional relationship he and his siblings had with Bert. They camp on the property and begin to see and hear some inexplicable things, making them wonder if Bert was right all along.

I admit I got sucked in at the beginning. Like I said, I love a documentary. The Unsolved Mysteries segment is real and the interviews with the Wall “siblings” seemed legit. It all came off pretty natural for the first half of the film, even the locals who gave their take on Bert and the area folklore sold me. Then they got to the ranch.

When they arrive, they are supposed to be met by Jake’s step-mother. Her car is there, but she is missing and the house is open. Jake discovers she is in the hospital. The group sets up camp down the road and that was my first clue something was up. If you’re visiting the family and they’re expecting you, why are you sleeping in an RV in the middle of the woods when there is a huge, empty house with running water and electricity?

Once the group starts exploring the property, the dynamic between them changes and they do a poor job of acting like they’re starting to turn on each other. A mysterious truck shows up several times in the middle of the night and terrorizes them, but they don’t leave and they still don’t go stay in the house.
There are several plot points, like a Nazi prison camp and a captured boar, that do nothing for the story other than add minutes I’ll never get back, plus SHAKY CAM! I already had a migraine when I began watching this. Had I know this is what I was in for I never would have bothered with it. What started as a ridiculous, yet plausible, documentary style film, turned into a found footage nightmare.

SPOILER, SPOILER, SPOILER! The whole thing is a ruse. Should you decide to watch it, you’ll see exactly what I’m talking about. While you will get supernatural validation, it won’t be until the last 30 seconds and it will not be satisfying. It might even give you a rage baby. I had several by the end of this and I’m not sure I can take care of them all by myself. How did this nonsense get funded?

Say something nice ~ I was happy this wasn’t some sort of American bastardization of Guillermo del Toro’s beautiful ghost story, which did have me worried when I first hit play. 

Supernatural Honey verdict: Half of a dead animal carcass out of five (the back half)