The Horror Honeys: Even Mike Vogel Isn’t Worth the Price of Admission...

Even Mike Vogel Isn’t Worth the Price of Admission...

A Supernatural Honey Review by Suzanne

The Deaths of Ian Stone (2007)

For my money, there is hardly a finer male specimen than Mike Vogel. He just gets better looking and more rugged as he gets older. He also happens to be a decent actor so it’s a win-win. Strapped for anything new to watch that didn’t involve a haunted house, I decided to check out a film from the “8 Films to Die For 2007” collection, The Deaths of Ian Stone.

Vogel stars as Ian Stone, an American man living in Britain, who dies at the hands of demon creatures called Harvesters, who feed off human fear. Once killed, he wakes in a completely different life and has no memory of past ones. Once he begins to remember, he is killed again. With each new life, he encounters the same people, although they play different roles. Most important is Jenny (Christina Cole). Ian must protect her from the Harvesters and get to the bottom of who he is and why this is all happening.

The first half of this movie really had me interested. The demons were pretty cool looking, the deaths were creative and bloody, and every time Ian wakes up in a new life, his situation is more unsavory than the last. He starts out as college hockey player, then a less than successful office worker. His third life sees him unemployed and his fourth finds him living in squalor as a junkie. Ian finally ends up in hospital in traction.

Shhhh... don't talk Mike. Don't talk. Just... stand there.
That looks, so, lifelike. Yeah. Totally real. Stellar work. 
If you’re a fan of Dexter, you’ll remember the gorgeous Jaime Murray as Lila Tournay from season 2. She is an equally impressive murderous bitch here as Medea, the head harvester, who has a special interest in Ian. 

Unfortunately, for all of the good things in the first act, where this film loses me is when Ian, with the help of a wayward Harvester, discovers his true identity and why all of this is happening to him and how only one thing can save him. To reveal this would give away the entire film and even though it’s from 2007, I don’t want to be accused of spoiling anything. Although I’d never seen it before and had someone bothered to spoil it for me, I would have saved myself nearly two hours.

The story is full of plot holes and the first half of the film feels rushed in order to get to the twist. There is no explanation for Ian being the only American in this film. My best guess is Vogel probably couldn’t do the accent. There is another scene toward the end, when Ian is in the hospital, where Medea and two other Harvesters are in their human form and wandering around in red and black patent leather cat suits. No one seems to notice. I’m not sure if there were alternate realities happening, but I would think that would raise at least one red flag.

Normal nurse attire in The Matrix Community General.
The Deaths of Ian Stone is a compilation of other film ideas in concept and execution, but done in a way that just makes you want to watch all those other films.

If I’m to be completely honest, what angered me the most is this film has a happy ending. Horror movies are not supposed to have happy endings.

For a decent Vogel fix, maybe I’ll re-watch season one of Bates Motel or Under the Dome.

Supernatural Honey Rating: 2 recurring deaths out of 5

The Deaths of Ian Stone is available on Netflix Streaming, Amazon Instant Video, YouTube VOD, Google Play, and DVD