The Horror Honeys: Slasher Honey's 10 More WTF Moments In Horror!

Slasher Honey's 10 More WTF Moments In Horror!

It's true that there are more than 10 moments in horror that leave you shaking your head and second guessing whether or not the writer/director has even seen a horror movie, so, here are a ten more of my favorites, or just the things that make me scream at the screen in frustration!



10. Not hanging up the phone/answering the phone
In modern horror films (and yes, some of the 80s ones too) when the killer is calling you from inside the house, you slam the phone down and run the hell away! Staying on the phone with a creepy stalker while they lay out their entire plan for maiming you in a horrifying fashion? How about no. When the killer keeps calling you, how about throwing your phone out the window or smashing it to bits? Just a suggestion.


9. Checking the breakers after the lights mysteriously go out
While this might be filed under "80s problems," when the power goes out, and the phone cord has been cut, and your cell phone is dead...don't go check on the breakers armed only with a flashlight, or a box of matches. Just huddle in the corner and kiss your butt goodbye.



8. Creating a monster you're pretty sure you can control
Now, there's something to be said for being a brilliant scientist - kudos. Using that brilliance to create a serum that will cure what ails mankind, even better - but using that high I.Q. to create a horrifying monster that you may or may not be able to control once it's agitated? Maybe not so smart. The mad scientist is usually the first casualty of their experiments, if they don't wind up turning into a monster themselves.



7. Ignoring local mythology/customs
Call me old fashioned, but when I go travelling, I make sure to check my attitude at the door and humble myself at the threshold of new experiences in foreign countries. Translation - just because you're American, doesn't mean you're going to survive. Also, deriding local customs or superstitions is more likely to get you turned into a nightcrawler than anything! So, really, just take the cross.


6. Splitting up a group
DUH - Perhaps one of the worst ideas in horror movies, it also makes it easier to pick off your team members. If you split up, the killer wins. So...don't do it, and don't announce it if you DO decide to do it.


5. Going into the basement
Similar to checking the breakers, going into the basement/crawlspace/attic/hole in the wall, will always end badly, or in a jump scare. Or, it ends in being possessed by Candarian demons and chained up down there with the old preserves until you get unceremoniously lit on fire or dismembered by your boyfriend or brother.



4. Filming everything
You people continually taking selfies, photographing your food, filming things on your damn phones or HD cameras can die first for all I care. In an age of "pictures or it didn't happen," most of history would be negated, and if you feel safe behind the lens of your grad gift, here's a little newsflash for you - NO ONE CARES. Least of all the killer.



3. Trying to reason with a monster
When has this ever ended well for anyone? Even Harry Potter had to admit that he couldn't reason with Professor Lupin once he was under the influence of the moon. While some monsters MAY have a gleam of humanity left to them, trying to reason with a charging, rabid and angry monster just might be a dumb idea. Much like sticking around to watch the transformation, trying to squeeze some humanity out of the zombie that used to be your family member might be a bad choice.



2. Saying "Hello" when exploring a mysterious noise in the dark
One of the oldest tropes in the book - if you have to call out "Hello" into a darkened house/room/area to convince yourself that you're NOT going to die actually works much the same way as screaming while running away. Don't give away your position if you want to live. Chances are, if the lights just went out suddenly, whoever is in the house with you, knows EXACTLY where you are, and *Spoiler Alert* it isn't your roomate/friend/cat that's in there with you.


1. Shooting zombies anywhere but the head
Sometimes I roll my eyes so hard it actually hurts me a little bit. Even though in horror movies the characters in them have miraculously never heard of, seen or are aware of any rules for horror movies or monsters - the "destroy the brain" theory for zombies has been around for a LONG time. Shooting zombies anywhere BUT the head is just redundant, or in some Walking Dead episodes, showboating.

Atta girl.