The Horror Honeys: Something Wicked Just Go Away

Something Wicked Just Go Away

A Supernatural Honey Sneak Peek Review

Way of the Wicked (2014)

I love free stuff, especially when that free stuff is movies. Getting screeners and/or movies ahead of release dates is better than Christmas… usually. When the Revenge Honey texted me to expect a movie for review, then followed it up with an evil laugh text, I thought I might be in trouble. When Way of the Wicked arrived, I knew I was.

The cover art depicts Christian Slater in priest collar, holding a cross upside down, with fire exploding from his groin region. At first glance you might think this was a movie about an evil, lustful priest. Nope, not even close. In fact, Slater is only in the film a total of about 6 minutes.

The film opens with Slater’s character, Father Henry, confronting young Robbie, who was present when a classmate died a mysterious and violent death. Flashback to the incident where the classmate is bleeding from the nose and choking on his own blood while Robbie and his friend Heather look on horrified. Henry presses Robbie for answers and also presses his cross toward Robbie’s face. Both Robbie and his mom are clearly uncomfortable and throw the priest out. Frankly, I’d be uncomfortable too as the cross Father Henry is wearing looks like something he picked up at a rapper’s yard sale.

Cut to 5 years later, when the kids are clearly 10 years older. Robbie, who had moved away after the childhood incident, is now back and looking to reconnect with Heather. Everyone hates him instantly, including me. When Heather’s circle of friends starts to die off after confrontations with Robbie, the now defrocked Father Henry enlists the help of Heather’s police officer father, John (Vinnie Jones), to take down Robbie who he believes to be the Devil’s spawn.

I usually like Vinnie Jones. He plays hard, smart-ass, tough guys and shoots everything and everyone in sight. Here, unfortunately, we get a watered down, “dramatic” Jones who portrays a widower cop with a drinking problem. He spends a good share of the film chasing after his rebellious daughter, yelling, “Heavah,” in his heavy British accent.

Jake Croker, who plays Robbie and best known for his roles as ‘young man #1’ and ‘dude #2’ in movies you’ve never heard of, was literally one of the worst actors I’ve ever seen. I’m not sure if he was just trying to play it tough and cool, but the result was a monotone, emotionless performance, conducted with a completely blank stare for the duration of the film. The mannequins in Maniac gave more believable performances than this kid. Seriously, my cats are better actors and I’m pretty sure one of them is developmentally disabled.

The rest of the cast of nobodies will probably continue to be that. None of the young actors were standouts nor did I feel any sympathy for any of these shrieking bullies. I will give props to the people casting this film in that they chose actors who look like real people. There were no polished, plastic, pretty people here. Some of them were downright ugly.

So, after watching this attempt at a horror film, I have to wonder if Revenge Honey has a score to settle with me. I mean, why else would she subject me to this? Does she not love Supernatural Honey anymore?

If nothing I’ve said has deterred you, Way of the Wicked will be released on DVD and blu ray on May 20th.

One final note: Remember when Christian Slater was cool? Yeah, me too and watching him in this, albeit briefly, saddens me. If you need me, I’ll be over in the corner, watching Heathers and drinking heavily… and crying.

Supernatural Honey Verdict: 1 bloody nose out of 5

There are seriously no other photos for this film.