Revenge Wednesday Jam ~ 'Take Me to Church'



My lover's got humour
She's the giggle at a funeral
Knows everybody's disapproval
I should've worshiped her sooner
If the heavens ever did speak
She's the last true mouthpiece
Every Sunday's getting more bleak
A fresh poison each week
'We were born sick,' you heard them say it...


If you're living in the States... or the UK... or anywhere with Top 40 radio, I'm quite sure you've heard Hozier's "Take Me to Church" a thousand times by now. You may even be sick of it. But I beseech you, listen to it one more time. And really listen. Take in the lyrics. I don't throw around the word "epic" often, but this track is just that. The line, "I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies,
I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife," is not only 100% Revenge Honey approved, but it also gives her a bit of the vapors. #horrorhoneyproblems. Bonus points for a video that elicits ALL the fucking feels. ~RH

Top Ten Genital Genocide Scenes in the History of Cinema!


The Revenge Honey's Top 10 Favorite Scenes of Penis Maiming

Horror fans like to think they can handle anything. Rape, murder, victims being sliced open and strangled with their own intestines; almost nothing will phase the seasoned horror veteran. However, there is one act of violence that will almost always cause viewers to squirm, and that is a castration/penectomy (and there is a difference, which you can look up on the interwebs. I'm not your biology teacher.) There is something about watching a fella lose his manhood that can easily send both genders into twitching fits. And the best part is, when the scene is well done, you will never forget it.

What follows are my ten favorite scenes of wing-wang mutilation. Some you've probably seen, a few you've probably never even heard of, but all of them will inevitably make you cross your legs. Enjoy!

I Couldn't Come Up with a Non-Pun Title... So This is What You Get.

A Revenge Honey New Release Review by Linnie

POSTER LIES! There is NO gun in that shower scene.
The Dark Place (2014)

Here at the Horror Honeys, we are HUGE fans of LGBTQ horror. But with most horror that focuses on any non-heteronormative lifestyle, it's extremely self-aware. By that I mean, the characters being gay is part of the story. When you watch Ticked Off Trannies with Knives, the fact that the characters are transvestites or transexuals is quite obviously relevant to the plot. It is supremely rare that a horror film comes out where the fact that the main characters are gay isn't relevant in any meaningful way: they just... are. This brings us to Jody Wheeler's The Dark Place, an independent thriller that doesn't treat the character's sexuality as a gimmick. It's a wonderful change of pace. 

I just wished the film was a little bit better.

Which isn't to say I didn't like it. I actually loved it. But I also hated it. Please accept my advance apologies: this review is going to be highly confusing.

Horror TV Jam ~ 'I Wish I Was the Moon'



Chimney falls and lovers blaze
Thought that I was young
Now I've freezing hands & bloodless veins
As numb as I've become
I'm so tired,
I wish I was the moon tonight


You may not have realized it, but every episode of True Blood was named after a song that featured in that week's episode. The soundtrack was one of the more entertaining elements of the show, even when it started to fall off narratively. But out of all the perfectly soundtracked moments, one of the best will always be the conclusion of season four, episode six, as Sookie and Eric have mad, passionate vamp sex in the woods while Neko Case's "I Wish I Was the Moon" played in the background. It was sexy, gorgeous, and if your jaw didn't drop, you aren't human. Or some supernatural version of human anyway...

Sleepy Hollow: Season 2, Episode 11 ~ Magnum Opus 1

A Horror TV Honey Mid Season Episode Review by Lisa


Well, it's that time of year again. Time for the mid season finale. I do not know who started this, but I'm not sure if I care for it or not. It certainly makes the writers kick things up a notch at a time when some shows start getting sluggish, but it also, usually, means a cliffhanger. I don't know about you, but I have a real love/hate relationship with cliffhangers.

One of Sleepy Hollow's many strong points is its ability to merge so many different myths, religions, urban legends and historical facts together and this episode was one of the very best examples of this. You mix some Clash of the Titans, Indiana Jones, DaVinci Code, The Fugitive and any sword fighting movie you like and we've got ourselves this week's episode of Sleepy Hollow. Hell, Ichabod even pulled off some pretty solid parkour action during the fight scene, so we can add Kung Fu to that list as well.

The Walking Dead: Season 5, Episode 7 ~ Crossed

A Horror TV Honey Midseason Finale Recap by Lisa

Don't tell me that you actually thought that this was going to be an action packed episode. We are five seasons into The Walking Dead and they always set up for a nail biting mid season finale. You know what that means. That means that the episode before must set everything up and that does not always equal tons of action.  The bible passages posted on the wall of the church have always been visible, but in this episode we were treated to a very obvious shot of them. So, what are the bible passages? Well, let me tell you and please feel free to do what you wish with this information.

Perhaps it gives insight into the show and perhaps it's just a sign on the wall.

Romans 6:4
We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.

Ezekiel 37:7 The Valley of Dry Bones
'I will put sinews on you, make flesh grow back on you, cover you with skin and put breath in you that you may come alive; and you will know that I am the LORD.'" So I prophesied as I was commanded; and as I prophesied, there was a noise, and behold, a rattling; and the bones came together, bone to its bone. And I looked, and behold, sinews were on them, and flesh grew and skin covered them; but there was no breath.

Honey Buzz ~ Casting the Devil in 'The Stand'


Back in August, I got off on a rant about the rumor that Warner Bros was making goo-goo eyes at America's favorite good old boy, Matthew McConaughey, to play the iconic "Hardcase" Randall Flagg in the reboot of The Stand...my immediate no-no feeling just months ago was apparently accurate, as I saw today that it's actually looking like this is going to happen. So, not only are we getting FOUR films, but we'll be getting four films of McConaughey's smugly humble face. I'm not feeling the McConnaissance, at all. For those that are, good for you, but take your smug attitude the fuck away from me. 

Even though I'm annoyed beyond ALL belief, I thought it might be a good idea to explore some other options... just in case. It's not just for the sake of this film that the casting for Flagg is so important - Randall Flagg is everywhere in Stephen King's haunted universe, and if you want a Dark Tower film(s) to be amazing, it all starts here.

Murder Monday Jam ~ Lotion



The night is very cold, I'm feeling kind of weak
I think I'll make myself a cap from your right buttocks cheek
And then I will go walking with my little dog
And then I'll bury you underneath a log

It rubs the lotion on its skin
Or else it gets the hose again
It rubs the lotion on its skin
Or else it gets the hose again
Yes, it does, Precious

One of the most oft quoted lines from Silence of the Lambs (aside from the chianti) is Buffalo Bill's falsetto screaming and the delicate delivery of "it puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again..." Hearing that line, and exchange put to music that is equally as delicate is quite the epic feat - this tune is light, and a little hipstery, but I don't mind because it's so goddamn disturbingly perfect. ~HH